Voices from Within

India!!!!

2011-12-21T04:30:00.000-06:00

Hi folks,

The exams are finally over. The projects are done and the reports are turned-in.
This means.... I get to sleep everyday... yay!
And whats more, I'm on a 4-week Indian vacation right now.

The days are magical. Starts with filter coffee, lovely morning breakfast (the malli idlies and crispy dosas..), the juices and soups, and the amazing lunch. Chennai is known for its fresh seafood and combine it with my mom = wow; the afternoon nap and the evening snack. Life is so good.

Prompts me to think, why? why did I leave all this?

Hope you guys are having a good time in this Holiday season.

cheers,
The V

Track of the sem

2011-11-11T22:02:00.001-06:00

Hey Guys,

How are ya'all doing?

I have been really busy these days. Even forgot about the usual Diwali post this year. Hope you guys had great fun. I had a pretty good time myself with the UT diwali group. Got to eat some good Indian food on Diwali night.

Ok, this is a quick post to mark one of these little things that make us smile. I haven't gotten to listen to a lot of tamil songs these days. But, happened to listen to this and got hooked on ever since. Playing in an infinite loop these days. This almost beats our "O Vennila" from Kadal desam.

"Sara Sara" from Vaagai Soda! - Lovely!

~Vinodh

The week!!

2011-10-08T16:14:00.000-05:00

Last week was eazily the bussiest week ever. Juggled multiple assignments, missed sleep for days and finally ..... my robot did not even win the penalty shoot out competition.

I guess the work itself, is the reward!

Reminded me of my undergrad days, where we slogged for 2 months on a robot design, went all the way to Mumbai (unfunded) and came back with empty hands!!
Oh life, you and your ways!!

-V

vinodh++;

2011-09-24T16:05:00.000-05:00

What if!!!

Hey Guys,

Hope you are doing great!

This is a customary post to mark my birthday, last friday. This is when I try to look at the year gone by and my plans for the future. And, thank you all for the wonderful wishes. Had a great day.

Can't believe I'm 28 already. I was thinking about all the other paths, my life could have taken. The possibilities seem unbounded. We only to live a tiny slice of the range of possibilities.

I think, it finally comes down to the choices that we make and in a way, people we meet.

Read a quote somewhere - "Who you'll be in 5 years depends on people you meet and books you read!!", I guess, I'm in pretty good hands!

Cheers,
-Vinodh

The magic of Memory

2011-09-03T16:53:00.003-05:00

Or the lack of it!!!

This is a short stub of an epiphany, that I had in a morning waiting for the School shuttle.

How amazing is Memory! Of course, I'm talking about our memory. In the brain(may be).

The concept of content addressability is so awesome. - I can sing a really old song, from somewhere in the middle, with incorrect lyrics. and very likely you'd recognize. This is so darn expensive (computationally). Ask Google - how it would love to have CAM.

We often forget an even more bizarre phenomenon - Forgetting itself.
How painful would it be, if we remembered, every single fight that we ever had? Some how we've evolved to forget the unpleasant things, in the same time remember the important ones.

Just knowing that, it wouldn't matter as much tomorrow, helps.

later,
V

Following the signs.

2011-07-27T16:45:00.002-05:00

Oh well..

My summer is going well. Hope things are fine with you guys too.

Its been a busy summer so far

A math course to dig out the forgotten probability theory
Auditing a Neuroscience/Psychology course on Cognitive development. Fascinating.
Teaching Assistant for a basic prog course. My students adore me, obviously.
Swimming - fish in the see, I know how you feel....
Salsa dancing - Never knew dancing could be fun. I'm getting pretty good at it too.
Biking - started biking to school
Research is going well too. Started a Fun project to generate puns/jokes automatically. Will kill you guys with my auto PJs sometime.

And a some other things which I'm not particularly proud of.

Now, coming back to the title,
There are days when I struggle.. in such pressure.. when I need some support, some pillar to lean on. Times when I long for a good friend, to share and discuss.

I had such a bad week a while ago and was really looking for a break...

And then, on a friday, I got an email from a friend, inviting me to a AOL satsang for Guru Poornima.
Like any other invitation, I didn't RSVP.

Then, later in the same afternoon I landed on a random webpage, with a PDF - DiaryofaDisciple, an everyday journal of a disciple of Swami Vivekananda. It was a eazy, light, happy read and he went on and on about how a Guru knows his followers and gives them what they want. He says, one needn't even ask. Just wanting is enough!

Then, it struck. I realized the Calling!!!

I had to change plans for the evening and made sure I was there. Helpful friends gave me a ride to the place far far away. And well.... I got my questions answered. (kinda)

I have this knack of meeting some really amazing people in the most unusual circumstances. The good evening, turned greater awesome when a gentleman, offered a ride home. Ah, the simple things that we discussed in the car.. well, some things are better left unsaid.

Life has its own way of sorting things out!!

love,
-Vinodh

Love, Laugh, Learn and Let go..

2011-05-26T18:00:00.002-05:00

If you want a quickie of what last-week's AOL Yesplus workshop was about, the title says it all.

The longer version is..
I took the course because, couple of folks, who I highly respect have been recommending this for a while and boy, am I glad that I did?? I had the most awesome time with some of the coolest people I've ever met.

This would probably be the only "spiritual" course, where you run around trees in the parking lot, dance crazy steps and do impromptu skits. I still wonder how it was possible, to make such a serious course, so much fun. It was a good blend of great breathing techniques, the famed SudarshanKriya and some freakish games.

What I liked most is the philosophy of simplicity itself. I tend to clutter myself with a lot of stale stuff. The forgotten saying - 'forgive and forget' restated:: Life is so short to carry around all the emotional baggage. Shed the weight. Travel light. Simplify life! - good concept, I should try.

The course was pretty deep with pranayamas, kriyas and meditation. But, if you just wanna nibble at the surface, you can takeaway a simple view:: Be happy - no matter what! Keep your mind at peace, at any cost! (Does this seem selfish? May be ..)

The homeworks were eye opening too: Make 3 new friends a day, do a nice thing to your parents. I was kinda surprised to see, how friendly strangers are and how even small actions can make someone's day.

On the whole, I got to reflect on myself and the workshop was hugely helpful in calming me down and I learnt some cool breathing techniques.

Until nexttime, be intensely happy
-Vinodh

Hello again.

2011-05-18T21:49:00.000-05:00

Oh well,

Long time indeed. How are you all doing?

From my end...
The crazy semester finally ended. Getting back to academia after 5 long years was not as eazy as I thought. The Industry had 'spoilt' me. But, I shouldn't complain. I had my share of fun in Bangalore. I should have expected this and made room for the initial ramp-up. Once I got into the groove, things started rolling. At the end, things got better and sem went Ok. And one of my papers got accepted to an IEEE conf (this will be my 2nd pub).

The good news is - there is a big tamil gang in UT and the bad news is most of them are like 4 yrs younger. It took a while to stop them from calling me - 'vaanga-ponga'. But still fun gang.

Summer break now. No big plans. Will be on campus doing stuff and taking a minor course in psychology.

And btw, I've registered for Art of Living course this week and looking forward to it.. all excited.

as always, be your super-self

-Vinodh

Snow!!!

2011-02-06T19:10:00.001-06:00

It doesn't snow often in Texas. It did lastweek - and it was Awesome!!

A surprise holiday made it even better - snow day!

Austin!! Austin!!

2011-01-17T11:35:00.001-06:00

Hello folks,

Greetings from Austin!!

I've reached Austin and settling in well. Moved in to an apt close to the campus, got a Phone, bought an old bike for commute, registered for courses... and the classes start tomorrow.

2011 has been awesome so far. On new year's day, I got a complimentary upgrade to business class, thanks to BA. :)
Austin has been very kind. - Apt hunting was ok. not tough; Weather is cold, but not severe.

Life is good in general - Making new friends, learning new things, cooking new stuff.

All is well here, except that I miss my morning Filter coffee and Masala dosa.

Until nexttime,
Be awesome,
--Vinodh

News!!!

2010-12-15T10:45:00.000-06:00

Hello folks,

We all know that vinbot has been very busy the last few months.. What has he been doing???

Here is the big secret. Most of the regulars should know already. But for the secretly following lot...

Finally, I've decided to jump back in to Academia!!! I've been pondering over it for a looong time.. and now, I think is just the right time.

This January, I'm off to UT Austin to pursue Masters and eventually a PhD.

Let me tell you, Its a tiring process - GRE, Toefl, writing-rewriting SOP, apping to different univs, mailing profs, waiting for admits, prepping financial docs, I20 and the insane VISA process... aaaahh!

I plan to be in Bangalore till Dec 23. I'll be flying out on Jan 1 from Chennai.

All excited, and a bit scared too!!

cheers,
Vinodh

The sweet Sand

2010-11-15T11:39:00.000-06:00

Week one:
The best part of my day
is the Good Morning that you say!!

And week two:
So charming are you
as lovely as morning dew.

Week three and four:
life awesome - restore
feel like a sailor seeing
the sweet Sand ashore!

-- Vinodh

p.s. I know.. Not very rhyming and not very deep. But had a great time writing. Life is good indeed!

Photo credits: timgoldsmith

The Joy of doing Nothing..

2010-11-08T05:25:00.002-06:00

Back in Blore after a super lazy vacationing week at home.

Think about it... Waking up with absolutely nothing in your todo list.. Reading books and Watching TV all day.. with mom taking care of you with filter coffees, soups, juices, cakes and fruits..

The relaxing morning walks and the fresh coconuts...

The lone evening strolls in the sands of Marina and melting cornettos on the way back...

The afternoon naps and evenings with Mr. Bean..

Night shows @ Satyam - Social network and The Town: just awesome!!

Relishing the Diwali delights right off the pan - the halwas, ladoos, athirasams and crispies... Slurrrrp!!!

And watching Chennai light up with fabulous fireworks on the Diwali nite...

Thats one week.. well spent!!!

Super-charged to fight for the Cubicle nation now.

happy living,
-Vinodh

Delightful Diwali...

2010-11-04T12:54:00.001-05:00

May this day spread Light and Love in your hearts...
Have an awesome Diwali.. Remember... No crackers!

Instant karma

2010-10-07T21:31:00.000-05:00

Long story short..
I had got Endhiran tickets for Thursday nite.
Multiple things happened on the same day. I was so frustrated and missing the movie was the least of my worries.

So, I auctioned the ticket at work..
10% discount?? none
25% ?? none
Get two pay for one?? - still none.

I've already had enough for the day and finally I gave away the tickets for Free!!

And magically, the problem modified itself to be more solvable.
Is this - Instant karma???

-Vinodh

Escape from the everyday

2010-09-13T10:51:00.010-05:00

Not everyday, you go 'Ooooh-my-God'; Not very often you see something sooo beautiful.. so awesome.. that makes you feel so blissful and complete.

Its been a while, since I wrote here; Been busy with multiple things. But this is something, I'd like to look back and cherish.

It was during the past weekend, when I least expected it. It started out as a simple-trip to a colleague's wedding in a nearby town, Vellore. The journey was pleasant; We discussed random things from running, traffic, evolution, work, love, Indian marriages and even God.

Time permitting, we decided to visit the new Golden temple in Sripuram. We had to wait a while, and walk a mile.. And then the good trip turned greater-awesome.

Yeah. I'm not the temple guy. But this aint that. This is big dive, deep into awesomeness !! Some times you just need to see these to realize how beautiful life really is.

The fabulously lit Golden vimanas againt the evening grey and their reflections in the pond... Awwww....

I'm doing injustice to the place, by trying to explain it in words. Go there and feel it.

"Life is not the amount of breaths you take, it's the moments that take your breath away" - This is one such moment!

Until next time,

Happy living,

-Vinodh

Does it matter?

2010-07-15T09:09:00.000-05:00

Strange day! Woke up with an unusual feeling that nothing really matters. Observed my actions the whole day for something significant.. something important.. something inspiring.. But NO.. May be, nothing matters.. really..

What design is this ??

2010-05-23T10:01:00.003-05:00

This is me venting about last week's Mangalore Crash.
----

One moment, everything is fine,
the next, fire and flame
starting the game blame.

I ask why?
How can a 6 month old have bad karma,
None understands all the drama!

Is it a coincidence or Bad action?
Bad weather or sleeping pilot,
doesn't matter now - all but
smoke, ashes, death and decay.

I doubt if there is a God,
Even If there is one,
He ain't doing any good job at all.

All those who ceased,
May they rest in peace.

-Vinodh

Question!

2010-04-14T11:50:00.000-05:00

Lets say, you are taking a leisure evening walk in the woods. As you go past a pond, you see a child drowning - Would you save her?

What if, it means to ruin a pair of expensive-shoes?

Will you still save her?

Do you still say - YES?

Then why not spend the cost of the shoes to save some 10 kids who are starved (of food, of education, of other basic needs)

---

I work with Asha, a NGO in Bangalore for the education of the under-previleged. This season, I've pledged to raise INR 50K.
Please consider donating - here .

If you choose to help some other cause, thats perfectly fine too!

cheers,
Vinodh

p.s. I read this provocative question in one of Peter Singer's works.

Who am I?

2010-03-28T10:35:00.001-05:00

And then, the week got better as I realized something interesting.

As I encountered, these one by one, a part of me felt like crap. But there was another part, which observed this part feeling bad!

Its like "Me seeing my-agitated-other-self" - A calm Super Ego monitoring the suffering Ego.

and then I saw another 'me', a higher-ego overseeing and "this Super Ego observing the Ego".

now, Who am I?

Week Wretched!!

2010-03-26T12:50:00.002-05:00

What a wretched week!!

Monday: Back to Bangalore - find my keys missing. Had to stay in friend's place for two days.
- No Bike, no laptop, no books, no iPod;
I could have shopped, but then, I decided to "experience" it - same clothes and smelly socks!! - aaah!

When I finally reached work late - the weekend simulations had crashed!

Wednesday: Email from Income Tax Dept about the non-receipt of my ITR-V. Called my C.A. He says, "We could have missed it. Can you re-sign and post it yourselves?" - WTH!

Thursday: A legal notice from a lawyer about non-payment of a broadband fee - for the service, which I had terminated looong time ago! 30 min with the dumb customer-care girl to explain their messup.

Friday: The week spills over. Who likes cubicle weekends.

Huh! When it rains, it pours!
lets see what the weekend has in store!

-Vinbot

Fear, Guilt, Love and Freedom!

2010-03-16T09:58:00.007-05:00

These are very, very different things and I don't know why do I confuse them?
I'm unsure of what the cause of my recent actions/decisions are.

Is it an act of Love or.. Fear of not doing it??
Or - is the fear of the possible Guilt of consequences of not doing it.
gets worse, when Gratitude joins the list.

At a deeper level, I kinda know the answer. But I pretend, that everything is fine. Things are under control.
I shield myself with lies - knowing that the truth'll cut-in even deeper.

A while back, I started asking myself this question : "Why do I do, what I do??"

If, the answer is something other than, "I want to do!", I think again.

"Need to do " - "supposed to do" - "meant to do" - "expected to do" : I'm sorry!!

Sometimes, I come up with weird answers like "That's the right thing to do." - I'm not sure how to deal with this yet!

I'm amazed at the number of things that I did, with out fully understanding Why!
I thought, I was living consciously until...

Now, what do you do when the most important folks ask for the most important things?

Its certainly not having-the-cake-and-eating types. Its not even a cake. Not the same cake, atleast!

Its like having to make a choice, without wanting to. And worse, a choice with all these varied emotions mixed up.

Will this Maniac March clear up things?

-Vinodh

Own your past!!

2010-03-05T08:19:00.002-06:00

Here is another experiment and a super failure!!

On 9 Feb'10, I deleted all the previous posts to reset the blog.. I said to myself - a Fresh Start .. Brand new Life... Tabula-rasa.. The Big Bang.

An experiment at Ctrl+Z;
life-prompt> rm -rf / ;

Also to make a metaphorical point!! rather to myself!

I almost got away with this, until last week.

I was lazily looking at a silly email fwd, of an optical illusion.. And I didn't get it the first time. But, when I saw the answer, I saw it.. But, when I tried to see it again, it was so obvious, it was no more fun! - how did I miss that!

When you get to know something, see something - there is NO WAY you can un-learn un-see it.

Have you felt this? - When you listen to the same track the second time, it loses its magic. You don't feel the same emotions.

With everyone you meet,
with every step you take..
with every spoken word,
with every book read, every music track,
with every passing moment,

You change.. You change for ever!! You are never the same - ever again.!!

This expt was a crude attempt of denial;
a futile effort to re-model the reality;

When I discussed this with my super-mom, she quipped,
If you can have a clean slate everytime, whats the fun?

-Vinbot

----
Oh yeah, before deleting, I took a xml-backup of the blog - to show my grand children. I thought they'd be amused at my poetic skills. All the prev posts shd be back shortly.

Hello Sunshine!

2010-03-04T10:52:00.000-06:00

The Sun is home and shining again.. brighter than ever!

Oh Life!

2010-03-02T11:09:00.001-06:00

At times, life surprises you with an unexpected googly - a lethal bouncer!!
It stuns you; Shakes you up; Makes you relook at life;
You panic! You're overcome by the mounting fear of taking guard ever again!

---
Biggest is the fear,
of losing someone dear!

You shudder at
the mere thought of walking alone,
in this world unknown;

crossing this desert-sand
without the helping-hand?

Hoping, the Sun lives on,
We all need the light to go-on!!

-Vinbot

Valentine Quip

2010-02-14T11:00:00.003-06:00

He argued logic,
She spoke science,
They weren't good in Chemistry anyway.

Hah!

Decluttering

2010-02-09T11:35:00.000-06:00

This life is short,
the vanities of the world are transient..
says Vivekananda.

How very true..

We have all been slaves to the past,
either basking in the glory of the bygone days,
or dwelling painfully in the past hurts.

Either way you missout in the present.

Well, in this short journey, why would anyone wanna carry the extra e-baggage.

De-clutter your life.
Shed your skin; There is lot more in life to fill your wardrobe.
Go shopping!

-Vinodh

What a year?

2010-02-07T05:47:00.003-06:00

Can't believe is been a year!

What if, I had over-slept the same day last year??

---

So, different it could have been
I wonder how'd be the otherside - Green?
perhaps unfazed by the cold-shiver,
had I not met the flowing river!

-Vinodh

Back

2010-01-20T12:53:00.006-06:00

Wishing everyone a great 2010.

The news is, I just met a few folks after a looong time and guess what they remembered. They asked about our poems. I didn't know that I'm an unusually good writer, with a unique simple style, writing profound stuff. Well, they didn say all that.. but you get the point. :)

Well, I started writing basically to "communicate"... with a specific agenda and now, that its off-the-table, I didn't feel the need for posting stuff. But, if thats what the public wants???

I start 2010, eying on some seriously challenging stuff. The ride is going to be a lot more fun this time..

See you next-time,

Until then Rock your 2010, with awesomeness!!

Break

2009-12-24T08:23:00.008-06:00

Freeee finally!!!

I've been wanting to take a month break for a while and I settled for what I could possibly get.

10 days off!!

I don't have to set my alarms at chip-timing runs.. No cross-talk nightmares... No verilog talking .. No nothing..

I'll be with myself in totality.

Now is the time to do all the 'nothing' I always wanted to do.

Plan to visit a few places before heading home for New Year.

Happy holidays!

The future...

2009-12-08T11:09:00.003-06:00

Wow!!! Can't remember the last time I had such an enthralling 3-hr discussion.. I met a few folks online and subscribed to the AI-meetup group. We had our first meet up today.. No big agenda.. No goal.. Just discussing your passion with like minded folks. It was like reliving the college days, spending countless hours in the sports-gallery discussing Life/God or Robots.

It was a small group of 6 but very diverse folks.. Dr.David Wood was here and shared his thoughts with us.. We talked about AI history, current research, Good/bad of AI, Morality/Philosophy, Sci-Fi movies, Cyber-slavery, Super Intelligent Machines and the Future of Machines... just awesome!!!

I came out of the meeting - fresher 'n with higher energy than I went in (having spent energy arguing). Now tell me how can the machines do that?

Little things..

2009-11-21T10:51:00.007-06:00

It started as a quite morning... No great morning runs/rides, nothing planned for the day.. The work-week hadn't spilled over the weekend too..

One of my friends needed a guinea-pig for recipe expts and invited me for lunch and I yessed In. After a good-simple meal, we sat down playing cards... Bluff is a super-simple game and It turned out to be so much fun.. I hadn't laughed like that in months.. 3 hrs of bluffing, and we were tired laughing out... cud n laugh anymore.. got hungry again..

Went out for ice-cream and..... died, a liberating "Death-by-Chocolate" - I wonder, who named it so and why? Its one of the best-est things ever... a big bowl - full of pure-awesomeness...

Tumkur takeoff

2009-11-08T06:51:00.008-06:00

I love these chilly-winter morning rides... the morning drizzle was an extra topping.. Reached the station to catch an early train out to Tumkur. The trip was to support a Awareness-walk by an org for Special children and Early Intervention. It was a beautiful train journey in the misty morning.

The walk was flagged off by a big-shot and there was some press coverage. Our pics cud have been flashed in the local newspaper(Tumkur Times??? anyone????). It was a short walk and the weather was perfect. We gave out fliers with more info on the effort. The Tumkur-folks were unspoilt and very receptive. They respected the walk, took time to read the fliers. The walk ended with a informative presentation.

The return journey was even more fun. We had decided to travel un-reserved and got open-tickets.. And offcourse, the train was late by 40 min.. We went out to kill time... had cocunuts, saw a 'Super-speciality hospital' (with only a 2-foot entrance), lonely theatre, poori-rice walas..

For a small town, lot of things were happening at the station. A funny man on the mike.. testing it for along time... A huge crowd had gathered, to witness the change in the train-timings.. When the train arrived, we hopped on a random coach.

We were chatting Non-stop.. discussed various things from expensive-indian-weddings to piracy to best-biriyanis to ... a mini movie of Santhosh's 24 hr run.. We even planned a Con-job to loot a ...Shushh!!!

Reached Bangalore by 2:20 and another train had reached the platform at the exact time.. Two-train-full-peapuls trying to climb a narrow-stairway was quite a sight. No prize for guessing shiny-head :)

Lunched at a place closeby, sealed a super-day with icecreams..

(More pics - coming soon)

$Life+=Rockrider

2009-10-25T11:22:00.012-05:00

And Vinbot buys a bike!!

Here is my New Rockrider...

After weeks of research and test-rides, I finally bought a BTwin RockRider 5.1 today. She is so sleek, super-lite and Awesome. Here is more about her.

I'll get biking after 8 yrs.. It all started as - *envying* Sensei/Balu's 100K/Mysore ride... Crazy Balaji's western ghats trip and When I heard about crazier folks @ BBC riding 1000km+ over 2 weeks.... Wow!!! The tipping point was Cyclothon and TFN'09!!

I started with a simple Neon to Thunder MTB and zeroed-in on Rockrider 5.1!!!! I love her.. Totally!!

I'll ride her to work atleast 2-3 days a week.. and the much longed-for long rides... I'd like to ride to Chennai and back (350km*2) with in the first year... lets see...

I have a long week of 'dead'lines comingup. But right now, I'm all excited and hyper abt my new bike!!!

-Vinbot

Say NO to Crackers!!!

2009-10-14T09:34:00.007-05:00

Where do you want them to be? - Classroom or Factory!!!
Those soft hands playing with pencils or working in hazardous factories with no safety???

Now, we have a Choice!!!

This video pushed me to launch a No-Crackers campaign this yr :

Wishing you an Enlightened Diwali !!!!

This could be you..

2009-10-13T19:53:00.004-05:00

This Could be you in 5 yrs...

Start running!!

Here is your chance to change...

TeamAsha 8K run: Oct 24
http://ashanet.org/bangalore/teamasha8k/

I wanna be a Software Engineer!!!

2009-10-01T08:35:00.004-05:00

Today, when I was riding back home in a drizzle, two kids asked for a ride to Indra Nagar and I picked them up. As the drizzle got heavier, I stopped... Caught up a sweet-chat over a cup of hot-chai and got to know them.. Grade 6, Eng medium, they like Math and Geography.

When I asked them abt what they wanna become, they answered in unison - "IT - Software Engineer"!!! I asked them who told them: Parents? Teachers?

"No anna.. I know.. I want that tag around my neck, have camera-phones, ride bikes/cars, work in AC, eat in big hotels, have credit cards, Laptops.. travel in aeroplanes ...""

OMG!!! This sure looks sexy from outside!!

$vinodh++;

2009-09-23T13:29:00.002-05:00

Kaveri Marathon..

2009-09-14T12:48:00.012-05:00

Great run.. Awesome fun.. I wud hav kicked myself if I had wuss'd out of run for that silly sinus block.
---
Left for Mysore from Cubbon @ 4.30. The drive itself was so much fun.. Non-stop entertainment from Sensei 'n Balaji. PJs galore.. Had the historic(?) Maddur vada and great coffee on the way. Checked-in to a hotel.. had dinner and rested for the race.

Woke up feeling great on Sunday!! Got ready and headed to the race-location. Coach wasn't particularly happy that I had forgotten to collect the bib and had to take a detour on the race day... Over 700 runners crowded the start-point.

The Full-ers started first.. Sensei and Santhosh shot off..

I think, Half-Marathon is a sweet-distance.. 21K is a great test of fitness 'n endurance.. Doesn't take a lot out of you and less prone to injuries.. I wonder why these crazies run the full to get roasted..

Then we started.. With my (un)training, I knew I cudn't shoot for a personal best. The focus was to finish strong with out any injury.

The Trail was a beauty! Gorgeous Kaveri flowing on one side and brilliant-green fields on the other.

After the initial 2K or so, I was nice and loose.. felt good.. kept myself well hydrated.. Reached the turn around point with no fuss... The first half was eazy..

And then trail-beauty turned a smoking hottie.. The scorching sun was too much..When I was struggling and thought, I'm gonna walk the rest - I heard someone yell, "Common Vinodh - run!!". There she was.. The super-woman.. I ran with Sensei for a few kms.. She was saying, "I ran all the way.. Didn take a walk-break yet".

The last stretch was tough.. started cramping and Hamstring hurt.. It all meant only one-thing. I shd stop giving work excuses 'n turn-up at the Training sessions and hit the gym regularly..

And flew to the finish line. Not great timing. But awesome fun..

Celebrated the Run @ CCD with Sizzling brownies/Icecreams...

Photos: Courtesy of Balaji - link

Run maadi! Run!!

2009-09-12T04:56:00.006-05:00

Here we go.. Leaving to Mysore for the Kaveri Half-marathon..

The build-up to the marathon has been a touch short of ideal..

I'm terribly under-trained... Havnt slept well for the past 2 weeks()... stiff back.. And now, I hav cold 'n fever...

Its gonna be hot n humid...

Lets see, If I can pull it off.. There is a much bigger cause..
More on Monday.. Wish me luck..

Command Not Found

2009-08-02T00:46:00.008-05:00

If only life had a command

rm -rf *

It would have been much easier to...

To un-install a (now) alien program which hogs the system memory-bandwidth!

Thrilling Thulir

2009-07-29T15:00:00.004-05:00

How can ppl ever live in remote villages?? How can one be away frm the comfort of urban life?? Unplugged from the web? - Impossible.. No Cellphones? - Are you kidding?

I am a web-addict.. My Laptop and Ipod will figure in the most essential things I'' ever "need"....

And now, I'm reprioritizing... Thanks to Sanjeev/Anita who roped-me-in for the trip. I least expected to hav such a wonderful weekend.. (Actually, I paused for a moment - I'm cynophobic and Shifu is also travelling..)

Thulir is an Education Resource Centre for children and young adults at Sittilingi, a tribal village in Dharmapuri district,Tamilnadu, India.

I was looking fwd to meet Anu & Krishna, Thulir's founders... I got to know abt them in my first ever Asha-meeting and I was so inspired.. How can folks, quit regular jobs, move to remote tribal villages and set up a resource centre??? One of my primal inspirations to take the red-pill...

That was an awesome weekend with an array of acitivies..

Building brick-walls. Learning how to stable walls.
Playing with a Calf (You guessed it right, Lakshmi is her name..)
Logic puzzles with kids..
Gardening.. I cut a small tree.. ( Wait.. That was shading the solar panels. BTW, the whole school is solar powered..)

Reading Chittu's comics (No. You cannot subscribe to Dirter, the stinky pig!! U'll need a different currency)
Playing soccer with kids..
Biking around the village..
Visited a Coconut farm.. drank one right off a tree..
When I enquired about Chilled water, Next town is 13 miles away..
Building logic-gates from BJTs with Sanj.. (Been a long time since I played with transistors.. that was Fun.. I was pretty good.)
Blinking lights with a multi-vibrator..[When you visit nexttime, Be prepared for Blinking-Thulir welcoming you...]

WOW.. the clear night sky was spectacular.. Morning Bike ride was even better..

In all, I had a good break.. a terrific trip... I'll try to visit atleast once a quarter.

Photos here: http://picasaweb.google.com/sanjeev.ranganathan/ThulirJuly2009#

Will post a more detailed/formal report in Team Asha/Ashablog in a week.

Happy living,
-Vinodh

Mind Games and Mixed Signals

2009-07-19T07:29:00.008-05:00

Hello, my recurring dream,
you got me lost in the love stream..
The twinkle in your mystic eyes
sends even the pisces flying-high

I have trouble learning all the while,
the language of your silent smile...

Can't get the Mixed-signals decode
With your Mind-games,
my heart clocks overload..

Spending my time the way unseen -
Starring all day at the GTalk screen
when you are online green.

Honey, I love you still
and I always will..

-Vinodh

What is Science??

2009-07-11T10:09:00.006-05:00

And a group of enthu kids bombard you with crazy answers...

What scientists do...
Stuff in science book...
Things that work...
What is done in the science lab..
....

This is the first question that I asked in the interaction with the Doddenakundi-School kids. We, @ AMD, plan to do a 8-week Science project with the kids... Having taken them to the Science/Tech Museum the previous week, we had our first interaction with the kids.

I have already had a blazing morning, running with Ananya kids, Karate session and a great Breakfast. I was really excited to connect with the kids and the project...

We formed groups of five kids each, with atleast one speaking English. Only very few of us could talk Kannada or Tamil. I interacted with 2 groups and It was great fun getting to know them.

After a small intro, we discussed various things.. shared a few jokes.. then I asked the question.. "What is Science".... and that was when they shot back with great answers... It was really interesting to learn how/what they perceive as Science...

I asked them to look around and see if there is any Science around them... that very moment, an Aircraft from HAL took off, blaring...

One kid asked - Is Aeroplane science?
Yes!!
Then, cars and bikes are science?
Yes!!

Another kid, checked her watch. I asked her, if she sees science there?
Yes!!
Cellphone..
Computers..
Doctors and medicine..

We discussed this for over 30 min...

Then one declared -

"Science is everywhere... Science is everything.."

I haven't heard of a truer statement.

While parting, I left them with two questions..
* How planes fly and How ships sail.. They seem to have a vague idea why.. I asked them to ask parents, bros, books, papers...

Next week, I'm gonna show them a video of how these work.. They promised to teach me Kannada as well..

After we left, one kid Divya - came up with "Anna, We like you very much!! Thank you!"

Kiddos, I love you all too...

-Vinodh

The Yellow Knights...

2009-07-05T00:58:00.007-05:00

The Yellow Knights

We were a crazy-running bunch,
hanging out for a quick brunch..
until Sensei taught us to reverse-punch.

We learnt to block hard,
None can attack us off-guard..

Our own knife-hand-strike
- as mighty as a shark-bite!!

Mae-Giri, the front kick..
is not a simple trick..
You gotta be double-quick
and yet be as smooth as Indian-Silk

Kata - is it a dance or a fight?
With all its grace is an elegant sight
We did it right with a GI - white
and became Yellow-knight..

Arigato Sensei..

And Yeah.... Kiiiiah!!!

-Vinodh

More Pics @:http://picasaweb.google.com/teamasha8k/KarateYellowBeltTest?authkey=Gv1sRgCN_e6qjMuuSMDw&feat=email#

Asha's Blr Blog: http://teamashablr.blogspot.com/

Sucksman's Blog:http://thisissucksman.blogspot.com/

Best Gift ever??

2009-06-24T11:09:00.005-05:00

How about a poem for a Bday gift... Enjoy!!!

Happy B'day!!

Hey, your own fluent-self,
You are 'the Awesomeness' off-the-shelf.
We love you for what you are
Thanks for being the guiding-star.

Happy B'day dear,
Wishing you a rocking year..
A year of color 'n cheer,
and happiness-sheer

With your rare-natural grace
and the ever-smiling blissful face,
I'm sure You'll ace
life's every race!!!

-Vinodh

:%s/We/I/g

Reality Grounding...

2009-06-21T08:53:00.005-05:00

What do you do, When you have sailed thru' the oceans, conquered the peaks, 'n you think, its all going to be over when you reach the horizon, and.... you see a Great Desert to cross..

Well, I thought I have learnt a lot and have grown tremendously, as person in the last few years.. But, now and then I meet a good-friend, who says, "Vinodh - you are good! but you'd be great - if ...". Sometimes, I'd go into defense and explain myself out. But when a comment comes from a genuine person, I'd take time to contemplate. Today, I met one such person with an interesting input.

Usually, I get confused, go into-a-shell, neglect the world around, take time with myself to reflect on the remark, to introspect and come-out with some action-items... But the problem is that this exercise is very taxing.. It takes too much out of me.

Not sure how long this is gonna take!!!

I'm usually hyper-energetic, and at times I need these "Reality Grounding"!!!

If you think you are perfect, think again!!!

Four Fantastic Years...

2009-06-15T11:40:00.008-05:00

This day marks the end of 4 years in Bangalore. It doesn't seem that long ago,when I almost cried, as my folks left me in a appt. I was going to live out of home for the first time.

The transformation from a Selfish-confused-Ignorant-Fearful-naive-spoilt Grad to 'what-I-am-now' has been phenomenal. These 4 years easily are the best years of my life..[Ofcourse, I had great schooling and college life.. But this is something extraordinary]

As I look back....

Friends: I have never had trouble finding good friends. But here, I got to interact with great people. Living with him was an education in itself. I've found some wonderful folks online too (Steve, Chris, PaulGraham, SethGodin..).. I get to interact with some stirring, folks in ASHA. Inspiration was always - just around the corner...

Spiritual: Exponential growth here.. In search of the answers, I tried different philosophies. [ISKCON, Sri Ramana, Ramakrishna Mission, Vedanta, Bhuddhism..]. I've travelled to ashrams 'n temples.. met some great people with interesting tales... I have had my own share of "Extraordinary-experiences".. Right now, I need more than just books 'n words. I'm an agnostic, [open to be proved wrong.]

Art: Didn't know I had so much in me.. I have tried my hand at Guitar, pencil-sketching and Tin-Whistling. Enjoyed everything thoroughly. Now, I practice Karate.. I'm writing poems..

Health: I'm fitter than I ever was.. I plan to run two marathons this season.

I've had my own "Thunderbolt" moment.

I have read some amazing books. "Veronica decides to die" is my favorite... My reading queue just keeps growing.. (over 25 books now suggested by various folks).

Of course, the ride hasn't been smooth. I have seen ups and downs.. I have touched down the lowest of lows.. I have recovered from greatest of set-backs. I take credit for hanging in there.. I have taken some tuf decisions. I have grown to let go of things [habits/things/people] which have pulled me back in the past.

But.. the Single most important - the defining thing that stands out in this 4 yr period is my perspective of the world. Around late 2006, was when I discovered "the Void within".. I had good blokes, great frnz, earned a good sum, had everything I wanted. But, still something was missing. I wasn't complete. I started reading philosophies searching for the meaning of life and stuff. I cannot say I totally failed in the mission. It took me somewhere.. But still, lot of things were left unanswered. The craving only got worse..

Then, I was introduced to Asha and started working with kids.. It didn't directly answer my questions. But got introduced to a bigger set to challenges and lets see what I do..

Oh...Yeah.. Life is good... and the best is yet to come!

Coffee with Love!!

2009-06-05T13:05:00.003-05:00

How about serving food at the counter all day?? It sure sounds a boring job..
But, I was amazed to see how this guy made a difference..
He radiates hope, love and happiness!!!

This guy works in the restaurant chain - Adyar Anandha Bhavan (A2B), CMH road, Bangalore.

The rain had just stopped and after a long day, I stopped by to have a snack and cuppa coffee.. and This is what I got..

Coffee with Love

Wow!!! I don't know if he consciously does it to make others happy or its just the way he is.. No matter.. Everyone was leaving the counter smiling..

I asked for a pic with him.. He smiles off and says.. "No sir.. The queue is long.."

Serving Smiles...

These little things go a long way.. If not for this guy, I wud have just ate and slept... Now, I practiced my Tin-whistle(video post coming-up).. cleaned my room.. I added a pic-slide-show to the site.. (More about it tomorrow.).. gonna read the book i'm gifting someone dear and I'm writing this post..

Thanks mate!! You are changing the world in your own way, with one smile at a time!!

Keep Rocking!!

Now, when I have a bad day, I know where to go!! :)

That was a head-on-dive deep, in to Awesomeness.. a Rocking weekend ahead!!!

-Vinodh

May Madness:Round up

2009-06-02T10:13:00.004-05:00

This May it was Total Madness!!! Incredible stuff!!!

Got in touch with the Frisbee freaks and I love playing with them..

The weekends in particular were amazing...

9: The educating farm visit..

16/17 : Had an amazing Coorg trip.. The breath-taking view of the valley in Raja-Seat, Waking up to chirping birds, Walking up in bare-foot in the dew, with hills all round.. listening to my favorite tunes, lying down in the grass with feet in a cold fresh water stream.. WOW!! Totally mystifying..

23: The next weekend was even better.. The awesome-saturday

31: And another Super-Sunday at the Sunfeast 10K run.. Had a gala time.. The day got better.. played Cricket, Soccer, Antakshari.. spent a whole rainy night @ Ananya.. That place still continues to amaze me.

Made an unplanned-emergency landing in Chennai.. That was quite an experience in itself!!!

But I will remember this maniac-May for one singular moment..

That single most important moment was when I visited ISKCON, Bangalore with my folks.. I should tell you that right now I'm convinced that I don't have enough information to believe the existence of generally accepted name/form of God. I have always had doubts with Idol worship and I have a totally different notion of God. The Creator-Annihilator model never impressed me. But still, I would play safe.. What do I stand to lose - to offer my prayers, just in case if he exists.. I didn't dare to make him unhappy..

But on that day, I decided to quit lying. At the same time, I didn't want to create a big fuss with my folks and hence went in to the temple, appreciated the architecture and the beautifully dressed dolls. I participated in poojas 'n all.. I don't have a problem with wearingchandan or kunkum.. I know what they mean to me...

On 17 May 2009, I became truly Agnostic!!! One step close to Congruent-Harmonious living!!!

Let see what this June has in store!!

Clean slate

2009-06-01T12:18:00.005-05:00

Today is June 1. First working day of a brand new-academic year. Shiny white uniforms, sparkling new shoes, new books, new bags, new friends, new class room, new teachers..

I was nostalgic, when I saw the kids getting into the school-bus.. I could see myself.. School days were so much fun..

It is a fresh start.. All your faults are forgotten.. All your hard-work the prev year is gone.. Its a clean-slate to start all over again.. Its a total system-reset.. I wish I can have that clean-slate now..

But, Wait a minute..

I have.. Everyone has..

Yes!!! Every day is new.. Every minute is fresh.. You get to decide what you do right now..

Ofcourse, Its not a clean slate.. But everyday is a fresh page in the book of life.. and you can do anything.. start a new chapter... sketch a new project.. write a poem.. or anything else...

What are you waiting for?? How about starting that long-due legacy project today??

-- Vinodh

Good lie - Bad lie..

2009-05-26T07:23:00.010-05:00

Let me tell you the secret-truth - hush!!!!

I am a Liar!

liar-paradox

Yes, I’m a Liar, a Big Liar... And I’m not ashamed of it.

I know that Lying is regarded - a very bad-habit.. Actually much worse.. lying is considered adharma.

"திருடாதே , பொய்சொல்லாதே , பிச்சைஎடுக்கதே" - three things my dad always advised. It is supposed to be that Important.. the Truth.

[Translates to.. “Don’t steal, Don’t lie, Don’t beg”]

True, that Valluvar argues that, lying can be good as long as…link [291, Vaaimai]

But lets not talk about that… this is not what is worrying me right now..

Now, Why do we lie??

Sometimes, we lie to simplify the situation..(or to avoid further unnecessary questions)

Sometimes, we lie for their own protection.. (The case of kids when they ask about God/terrorism/evolution/sex..)

[Let’s ignore folks who lie for our own selfish good.. Yeah.. I have seen these guys too]

And Yes, I lie for these reasons...and as long as I know what I do, I don’t have any guilt..

But, there are times, I feel guilty..

Sometimes I lie to…….. Myself.

Yes, I lie to me..

I fool myself for my own comfort..

I dupe myself to believe a fake-reality..

Whenever, Its time to ask tough questions,

or when the answers are unknown

or worse - when the answers are bitter or tough to digest,

I deceive myself.... with something like “Time will answer”… “I’ll know when I’m supposed to know”… “That’s not important”… “I don’t have time for that right now”… “It’ll all be OK in the end”

I have always sought comfort under the blanket of my own lies.

Now, that I have realized the problem of bad-lie, I’m trying consciously not to fool myself anymore.

The going hasn't been easy..When I try to face the raw truth, sometimes I get overwhelmed, I get low, I get dispirited... but, once I get over this and succeed, I'll be a huge leap closer to true-congruent living. Lets see how long I take to reach there!

Have you Quit lying to yourself? Let me know how!

Drop a line at vinbot [at] gmail [dot] com.

Until next time, Quit lying!!!

-Vinodh

Awesome Saturday!!

2009-05-23T13:15:00.004-05:00

Well.. Saturdays don't get any better than this..

Woke up @ 5 am.. The day started with a Chilly ride to Ananya. I love these long-morning rides. The Orange Sunrise in Airport road is an incentive to get up early on a Saturday Mrng.. The roadside Chai seems to get better every week.

It was a tapering run just before the next-week's race. The weather was perfect for a great destressing run.. Played a bit of Ultimate-frisbee next.. Only 2-3 players each side, a small play area.. but it was great fun..

Ananya is a Magical place, and has so much to offer.. Today, It taught us farming. George was so enthusiastic to share with us the process/techniques. [Start->Programs->MicroSoft Farming??? - No] We ploughed the field, planted the Ginger/Bean sprouts, manured and watered them. This is the closest, I'll ever get to real-working for a while. Totally fulfilling experience. [I'm sure Sucksman will have something to say here..]

Asha Farming Sangha: Sriram (Senior scientist), Me, (The real farmer), Narmada (Officer on Spl.duty), Manjula (Senior Vice President), Banna (Apprentice), Sucksman Balu(PR)

It was only 9 am, and I was already having so much fun..

Shivamma's kitchen beckoned us. Idlies floating in Sambhar and hot masala tea.. Wow.. We discussed various things over breakfast. The group is getting crazier by the day. We'll take over Bangalore one day.
Tidbits: I'm the popular choice for the next Sempai (First student in Karate Dojo)..
Apparently, I am always "on a high" and I can be drugged even without drugs.

We parted our ways by 10... Some cycled back.. I rode back.. Some others decided to walk back..

On the way back, I stopped at the usual cane-juice place.. Every week I see the HAL Aerospace museum across wanted to visit one day.. And Today was the day..

The Museum had a lot of interesting exhibits.. I got to see our own MiG-21's, Jaguars, Light Combat Aircrafts. But no Sukhois or F16s..

MiG21

A train of enthu-school kids were gazing at the exhibits in astonishment.. Wow.. Kids and their fascinating questions.. I couldn't answer them all but did learn from them. I wonder if I still have the curiosity to know about new things..

Headed back home around noon. Showered and napped.. The whole day, I was unplugged from the Web - thanks to the power cut. Spent the afternoon with Atlas Shrugged.

Outlined and developed a short-story.. I do a lot of writing these days and I love it.. Should organize a bit more and channelize the energy..

Went out for the usual Saturday-evening stroll. The sight of kids playing is blissful.. I sometimes play with them - until their parents comeback.. [Whats the deal with them? Y wont they let the kids play with me??]

Calvin & Hobbes and Sweet-corn - Great combination for a wonderful Saturday evening.

8 pm and its time for IPL-semi finals: Bangalore Vs Chennai. 3 hrs of solid entertainment and Bangalore has just won as I write this..

And.. thats an Awesome Saturday..

Hello Super Sunday... What do you have in store??

And Life moves on..

2009-05-22T11:34:00.003-05:00

Life, at times can be unjust.
when you bite the dust,
in everything - you mistrust.

It may look like a scary brawl,
But these are the times to stand tall
and wither it all like the great Wall.

Life is too short to worry,
It'll all be over in a hurry!!!

--Vinodh

Enough...

2009-05-20T14:42:00.003-05:00

Oh Yeah, things do go wrong
no matter you're how strong

Just when you are out of town,
the castle comes crashing down.

What do you do, hitting zero-ground,
And there is no turning around?

When the Truth turns out to be a lie,
when you lose the sole guiding eye?

Love and Care ??
They're mere pretense, I swear!!

There is nothing to confess,
I am just helpless.

Life is a bluff.
'n I have had enough..

--Vinodh

I'm not alone

2009-05-09T22:40:00.005-05:00

It was a long drive yesterday to the farm, and I had a very interesting discussion with the Sensei.. I gotta understand that I'm not alone in the quest for the ultimate truth!! Everyone has their own way... and as Vivekananda says, the answer lies within!

So Vinodh, Which college are you in?

2009-05-09T13:06:00.019-05:00

So Vinodh, Which college are you in?

WOWWWW!!! Perfect 'cherry topping' to an amazing day!!

The day started with me acting as 'Assistant-sub-coach' to run with the Ananya kids. Practiced karate after a good long run.. Hmm.. Someday I'll blow that candle with a punch!!!

It was very kind of Sensei invite me to her farm 'n I yes'd in. Met a few bike enthusiasts. Biking looks interesting.. Its kinda less tiring than running, you get to ride longer and promises to be as fun.. That'd take me a step closer to a triathlon.

The farm was huge. Lotsa trees.. loved those mangoes.. broke a mango with a Shuto-Uchi..well, almost :) .. Had an amazing time under the trees..

The 'Icing on the cake' was while walking back to the car.. This new friend asked me,

"So, Vinodh, which college are you in?"

Well, being the narcissist that I am, I know I workout hard to get fitter and be in shape.. And still, Wow!!! I was flattered!!

Sealed off the day with gr8 Konkani food @ Kanua..

-Vinodh

Frisbee fever..

2009-05-07T06:07:00.007-05:00

Wow.. Bangalore is a great place.. I have fallen in love with this awesome city.. One can find anything here...

There is a club for every darn thing. You name it.. Its there.. In the past 4 yrs, I have googled and found these groups.. Running, Foreign language, Adventure, Charity, Rubik's cube, Effective Educational methods, Bhagavad Gita study group, Tin-Whistling, Start-ups, Poetry Writing, Robotics/AI, Vedic Math,.. and now.. Ultimate frisbee.. (the Laughter club shd be interesting to try out..)

Heard about Ultimate-Frisbee from Balu..... looked up online.. Wow.. there is a big group of hi-enthu folks playing right across my work-place...

Subscribed to the group, went in early this mrng and had an absolutely amazing time... I wasn't exceptionally great at it... But I didn suck! (OK.. I was caught running with the disk-twice.. I'll learn)

There is a lotta physics in Ultimate frisbee ebooks online.. Its certainly eazy to pickup.. Can prove tough to master!!

Hope I get better in the following weeks...

Its Frisbee fever this May... Are you guys game?

-Vinodh

Seth Godin knows me...

2009-05-04T08:37:00.011-05:00

Yeah.. You read it right. Seth Godin knows me.

When I read a good book or a great article, I write a thanks note to the author. And seldom do I get a response.

Guess what I saw in my inbox today.. The great Godin himself has written back to me...

I highly recommend reading his blog/books.

here is the mail.
---

from Seth Godin
to Vinodh Kumar
date Mon, May 4, 2009 at 12:27 AM
subject Re: Thank you for Inspiring.

Wow!!!

thanks Vinodh!!

I appreciate it.
=============================
Seth Godin
45 Main Street 3R
Hastings on Hudson, NY 10706
http://www.sethgodin.com (click on my head!)

--------------------------------------------------------
On May 3, 2009, at 2:44 PM, Vinodh wrote:
Dear Seth Godin,

I'm a regular @ your blog and I love it. Your writing is inspiring.
Thanks for being Seth Godin and inspiring us.

-Vinodh
Bangalore,India

Every little drop counts...

2009-05-01T12:23:00.009-05:00

Heard of this story??

A man is walking along a beach where thousands of starfish have been washed onto the sand. He sees another man, scooping and bending, then hurling something out to sea again and again. When he catches up, he sees that the man is throwing marooned starfish into the water.

“There are too many to save,” said the first man. “What you’re doing is meaningless.”

The second man flings another starfish into the water, looks at the first man, and smiles. “It certainly meant a great deal to that one.”

----

There are times when we wonder if its worth it. I tell myself - "Every little drop counts"

Of late, I have been spending time with 2-3 kids@ Ananya, helping them with their exams. A few folks asked me, if its worth it - The 2*20km ride on a well earned Saturday! When I answered that, I am trying to give something back to the system, he prompted that, the problem is not isolated. The whole education system needs a complete make-over and what I am doing is Insignificant.

Yes! What I'm doing may not change-the-world overnight... But It does mean a lot to these kids. More over I get to know some great folks there, who seek answers to the same questions. This networking will certainly help me in the long run to challenge authority and change the world.

More importantly, this helps me find a way to fill 'The Void' within!

-Vinodh

Waiting Game.

2009-04-22T11:12:00.005-05:00

Why do you love - you ask!

I don't have a clue.
Now, I see the world only in You!

In the Bliss of a child's smile
and the Emerald isle..
Fresh morning dew
and the moonlight blue..
- I see nothing but you!

Its a heavenly view..
in the world - brand new
Fell in love, even before I knew,

I live - only in your dream
floating in the love stream
I cede - 'To love' is the feeling supreme
and there is no extreme.

Rain cant hide in clouds for long,
Even if everything goes wrong,
Our love will only grow strong
My heart is where you rightly belong!!

I know - You feel the same
Then, why is the waiting game?

--Vinodh

To Do B4 30

2009-04-14T13:40:00.011-05:00

Here is the list of things that I want to do before I turn 30. The next five years are the ones when I'll be in peak physical health, mental toughness and enjoy total freedom to do all of these..

The list in no particular order..

Running 4 Marathons in 4 weeks
Swimming in Deep sea
Publish some of my poems/short stories as a book!
Sky Diving
Scuba diving/Snorkeling
Skiing
Bungee Jumping - check :)! !!
Gamble - (I hav played poker.. This is about big money in Vegas.)
Getting Drunk..
Smoke a Cuban Cigar..

I have a few personal stuff as well, which I have not included for obvious reasons. ;)

Now, If you have something interesting in your list, post it in the comments...

Happy living,
-Vinodh

Bungee...

2009-04-11T07:29:00.008-05:00

- The Mounting Fear when you look down the platform into darkness from 110 feet.

- The rush of adrenaline when you plunge into nothingness..

- Amazing free fall for 2-3 seconds before the bungee pull-back..

Yeah.. I had all these experiences and much more this friday(10 Apr).

Only 2 other folks showed interest.... We, (Myself, Vachan 'n Millo) had our jumps slotted at 12 to 1 PM on Friday. When we arrived in the arena, there were about 100 ppl already waiting 'n the regn. was temporarily closed. We were asked to come back after lunch at 3.

We headed out to a dhaba, close by. Had some light north-indian stuff.. chatted around.. and when we came back, we had our medical tests done.. and I was the 82nd jumper. I would get to jump at around 6-7 pm. With over 3 hrs to kill, we cheked out the paintball arena near by. They had some cool deals for the jumpers. But sadly, we couldn't find an opposing team. We were only 3 and it won't be fun with just 3. We went out for a walk instead.

Found a good spot by the roadside, had some hot chai... We discussed interesting things about life, spirituality, fulfillment, career and a lot more. That 2 hr chat proved that my theory was right. "People are essentially good, however hard they try to behave as a**holes" .

When we reached station at 6, there were 10 more ppl to jump ahead of us.. As I got closer to the jump, I got more 'n more nervous.. WTH?? And a few more folks joined the queue.. They had come late for their jumps.. That'll delay my jump by an hour.. I wanted to jump before sunfall and It didn look likely.. the full moon was already out...

It was interesting to note that about 10 ppl had gone all the way up but didn jump. They only said one thing: "Dude, you get up there... then you'll know..".. That scarred me even more.. The guy standing close by started the gyan. "Just dont look the ground.. dont think.. Just let go when
you are told to..". Well.. I didn want such a blind jump. I wanted to experince the fear as well.

Finally, came my chance... I was called to be strapped. I kept asking that guy, if thats enough? can I get extra roping done... He assured me that this can hold up to 140 kgs.. I hopped to a chair near by and waited for my chance..

Strapped on 'n waiting...

And WTH? These guys want a break. It was almost 8'o clock 'n they wanted a 15 min break.. I cant move.. I was strapped.. Well. you dont want to push them.. you dont want them to say.. "Oops. minor mistake dude.. I just missed one end of the rope..".

And Finally, I was called up.. to board the basket..

Weight - 72kg check...
Red Bungee - Check...
Master lock - Check...
Bungee end 1 - Check...
End 2 - Check...

Vinodh, are you ready? I nodded.

The crane went up and in seconds, I was in the top..

Up.. up and away..

Wow... The lovely sight of the beautiful full-moon in all its glory... breath taking.. I could only think of MAD! Guess whose face did I see in the full moon??..

Vinodh, turn around to you right. - I did.
Take deep breaths - I did.
Leave the bars 'n extend your arms like a bird.. - I did.
Just lean forward and let go.. I didn't
I could hear my heart beating...

One question.. Is the cord properly tied? Yes. you saw us check it down there..
I cant see the safety net down there. - It is there.. you just cant see from here..

Take deep breaths - On count of five..
5 ... 4 ... 3 ... 2 ... 1 ... And there I was, falling in the night sky.

I lost myself to the free fall for 2-3 seconds.. I wish I could put the experience into words... :) That was Awesome...

Yeah.. That was an Awesome Jump

Waited for Milind, Vachan to Jump, congratulated the organizers, had dinner 'n got back home!!!

That was an awesome day!

Bungee Jumping.. Check!!! One thing off my to-do-b4-30 list..

--------------
Update: On 11 Apr, an unfortunate accident had happened [link] . Was it luck or fate? We could n get slots on Saturday and hence did it on Friday. May his soul RIP.

Best of the Worst

2009-04-06T09:39:00.009-05:00

At times, things go wrong.

In your pursuit, You may fail. Life may not go as planned. Set-backs and break-downs punctuate the path taken. We take a break and relook at the situation, try to understand what went wrong.

There is a great saying in Tamil: Thirukkural

கேட்டினும் உண்டோர் உறுதி கிளைஞரை
நீட்டி அளப்பதோர் கோல்

-திருக்குறள், 796, பொருட்பால், நட்பியல், நட்பாராய்தல்!

Which roughly translates to "Misfortune is the yardstick to measure out kinsmen".

Yeah. The past few weeks have not been eazy to deal with. But It has helped me to identify my Army. When you want to live a fulfilling life, doing unconventional things, helping people along the way and live consciously, you need an army - you can't do it alone.

These testing times, provided me with the chance to get to know my 'real' friends. People who stood by, even in my craziest pursuit!! Folks who would call up and check on you in the middle of the night to make sure, you are OK!.. Lads, who can think for you, when you are too confused to think. Fellas, who would do stuff for you, even without asking 'why'!!

While it is great to know your real friends, its equally important to know whom you cannot count on. I also came across people, who ask questions just because of curiosity. They don't really care. They just want something to chew-on.

And the stuff about True Love:

Love for love's sake. Don't expect anything. Don't even expect to be loved back.

Eazy to say. Its proving to be difficult. Well.. If it were that eazier, we would all be Mother Teresa and the world would have been much better place.

Thought for the week:
Its eazy to fall in Love. But requires significant effort to stay in love!

--Vinodh

There is a whole chapter in Thirukkural on measuring-friendship - link. Amazing how this was thought out abt 2000 yrs back!!

Ever feel like giving up?

2009-03-30T12:53:00.011-05:00

At times you may fall -
from a tower, very tall,
Your back against the wall,
And when its not your call,
You just want life to - uninstall!!!

When times are tough,
'n the ride is rough,
You think – U’ve had enough!!

When everything is dried up
‘n you are tied up
You feel like giving-up.

When you just can’t cope,
You lose all hope!

But remember,
the hour darkest
'n times blackest
are right before dawn!!

When you fall,
get up and Fight ..
When you fail, try again
harder this time!

You may badly bleed,
Take a break, if you need.
But - don't ever concede!!
In the end, you'll succeed.

Life is such a wonderful gift!!
Why would anyone ever quit?

--Vinodh

----------
Inspiration: When I was looking for hope 'n pep-up online, I stumbled on this guy.. Great video here video of Nick Vujicic.

And thats why I love You...

2009-03-23T10:18:00.005-05:00

Your glorious eyes,
in the orange face,
with silken voice
and the innocent look!!!


When you caught me staring un-guilt,
that Smiling look with the head tilt,
You're my angel - my heart felt..

The glance from the corner of your eye
Sent me flying all-high!!!

Chocolate - I'd never ask a bite,
and seldom do others take it right!!
And, when I asked - craving,
you halved it without saving

At first sight -
My eyes popped,
My jaws dropped,
My pulse raced,
I was jolt -
with your thunderbolt!!
---

And These are the reasons - Unreal!!
The actual, reason - Now I reveal...
I love you -
Coz, I love you!!!

Love cant be reasoned,
You just fall unseasoned!!!

--Vinodh

Game Over!!

2009-03-12T12:10:00.008-05:00

'Love' - Is it a cruel game i asked?
where both the players lost.
Is it a monster stupid -
from the evil project Cupid?

'No' I heard - Its an elite feeling,
that gets the world healing.
Love that is selfless -
is not stress but bliss!

Honey, I respect your decision
'n wll honor it with precision.
Thy happiness is the mission -
'n your smile is my vision

In my magical world, I'll wait
And leave the rest to the fate.

My love forever'll be shining...
Its just the Beginning.

[Updated on 15 Mar '09]
Love is not a game to be played,
neither a ritual for hearts - exchanged,
Its a ocean of pure bliss,
where life drinks to live.

Love - you don't Give or Take
You love for love's sake.

--Vinodh

----------
This is the last post in the "Thunderbolt.." poem series. Thanks to those who inspired this series.

Celebrating Women...

2009-03-09T08:59:00.007-05:00

Saluting the women in my life...
--------------------
As a lil-sis,
growing up with her is bliss;
Running around trees
and all the tease..

As a Friend to share
when w're in despair...
She is all ears,
to allay our fears..

Grandma's tales with good moral
not to quarrel..
Dont forget the pampering Aunt,
who got all that you want.

As a Caring wife,
She is the fabric of your life..
the only shoulder,
when you'r growing older.
You'll cry 'n laugh
only with your better half.

'N finally, the miracle
and Life's pinnacle.
Like the divine Mother
there is no other!!

No wonder - Nature is feminine,
for Women are the spine
in every living line!

Women - Be proud!
I sing aloud,
"In you, I see God,
the Genesis of the World"

--Vinodh

And She thinks...

2009-03-07T09:38:00.004-06:00

This lad 's not bad,
thou' he z driving me mad,

I was a happy-go-lucky girl,
as simple as white pearl-
'n with(out) him, I'm in a twirl

Tell me how,
to decide now?

This decision is my prime.
'n I need more time

--Vinodh

All I ask is...

2009-03-06T10:26:00.003-06:00

I can't take it anymore
My brain is Sore -
thinking about you to the core..

All day long, I'm alone
waiting for your phone,
I wish u had known
that You are my own!!!

My time flies -
with crying eyes,
I know this isn't wise,
Neither can I fool myself in disguise..

Its it worth it, I ask
Should my feelings wear a mask -
'n burried in a flask?

All I ask is a Chance -
Give me a second glance!

I still don't know Baby,
I love you - maybe..

--Vinodh

I'll Still be Awesome

2009-03-05T09:49:00.002-06:00

Dont worry baby,
I'll be OK - maybe

liked you 'n told u so
Still, unsure why you said 'No'
Yeah, Its hard to let go!

Tough times ahead!!
'Yes' - If you had said,
I wud hav spoke to ur parents instead!

Even if we aren't an amazing twosome-
I'll still be awesome!

--Vinodh

A Kid's query

2009-03-04T08:22:00.004-06:00

I was wondering, what would a kid think reading about the terrorism in papers..
and this flew out...

-----

Papa, Is it safe out there?
I wouldn't dare to go anywhere.

Why is there a big divide?
Shdn't we stand side by side?
Everyone is hiding worldwide?

Isn't it wrong - to kill?
How do they get the will?
Or is it just the thrill?

Whats the govt doing -
while these bad guys are growing?

Tell me dad.
Why are these guys bad?
Its driving me mad.

Son - my Dear,
why is the fear?
the end is near!!!

While our politicians yawn,
The time has spawn
for a war to be drawn
in search of the dawn!

You are a knight..
Stand-up and fight
for the right
Now, its Black or White

--Vinodh

Mother

2009-02-22T06:50:00.007-06:00

Ma, This is for you!!! Love you..

-----

Dear mother,
You get the best of Dad, me and brother.

You redefined love n' care
And there is no compare

You taught us science 'n Math,
And to choose the right path.

You know - when to take the whip,
And not let us silp.

Ma, You are the centre-petal force,
holding us on course.

I learnt from you Mom -
to be calm,
in times of storm.

If there is another birth,
I wish to be born to you on earth,
nothing else is worth.

--Vinodh

Awesome Auroville ...

2009-02-17T20:38:00.003-06:00

We run
Not only for Fun!
Our goal is One -
To get the funds Done!

From start to finish
There was only one wish
To gift them their Childhood!
'coz nothing is closer to Godhood.

The trail was a beauty,
The volunteers were fruity!
Yeah - We were moved deeply.

The rising sun and chirping birds
It a sight for the Lords
'n can't be covered in words.

Yes, the run was tiresome
But Auroville was awesome!

On the whole-
With a united goal,
We ran our heart and soul.

~Vin-ode

http://ashanet.org/bangalore/marathon/runners/vinodh.html

Is this Love?

2009-02-12T04:28:00.004-06:00

We met not - a week ago!
I now sleep not - you know!

Never felt like this, ever before
I am not myself, anymore.

You eye looks brighter than the sun.
Is heaven undone?

Did you glide from the top up-above.
Oh my God... - Is this love?

The Poet in me...

2009-02-11T09:04:00.004-06:00

Trying my hand at tamil poetry... not bad huh?

அவளை பார்த்தேன்;
என்னை மறந்தேன்..
காற்றில் மிதந்தேன்
எதற்கும் துணிந்தேன்..
---

நிஜமா நிழலா - இது
சரியா தவறா - நான் என்னை இழந்தது
---

நான் உண்ண மறந்தேன் - உனக்கு உண்மை புரியலையா
நான் உறக்கம் இழக்கிறேன் - உமக்கு இறக்கம் இல்லையா
---

கண்களை மூடிநீன் - இருட்டில் நீ
பெண்களை பார்கிறேன் - அதிலும் நீ.
---

7th Feb 2009

2009-02-09T09:29:00.004-06:00

Despite a late friday-nite, I got up early for the run. All that head-banging previous nite, made me dizzy. I could not afford to miss this run - this was the last big run b4 the marathon. Munched-on some nuts and dates and got out for a freezing ride. The road-side Chai helped a bit...

It was a usual run.. Tired and hungry - i returned... played a bit of volley-ball and settled down for breakfast.. Then I think, i met someone really spl.. Interacted with kids, played with them, danced after a long time... had a lot of fun - named a cat - "Nayanthara".. and when I came home, I was happy and restless..

Thanks Veronica! You decided to die and helped me live!

2009-02-07T08:17:00.003-06:00

This is the write up in my Asha runner page.. posting it here for the regulars ;)
http://ashanet.org/bangalore/marathon/runners/vinodh.html
------------

5:30am. 15C in Blore.
Door: knock knock..
Me: who is it?
Door: Me? Buddybot 1.0
Me: Wait a minute.. I'll change for the Run..
During the run..
Me: Conversation mode… ON.
Buddybot: So, dude how did u start running?
Me: Fitness. To be in shape.
Buddybot: Funny humans. You eat more. Then burn-out the "batteries" calling it fitness.. Watta waste!!!
Me: Hang on! There is more to it. I eat more coz, I enjoy it. But can you?
Buddybot: Why do you hav 2 enjoy? And you complain next day to me that - u hav over eaten!!
Me: I relish the moment. I live. That improves my endurance.
Buddybot: Come on dude.. I can run all day, as long as the Sun is out.
Me: Dumbo.. I can run in the night as well..
Buddybot: During the night, I work more efficiently! My cooling functions can be turned off and I can run whole night until the sun is out the next mrng.
Me: Wait. There is more to it. I meet a lotta ppl in the run. I socialize. I can impress ppl with my fitness.
Buddybot: I socialize too.. I just upated my MySpace page and I can access orkut now, while running. Remember? How we met? In Orkut.
Me: That fate full day..Who would forget.
Buddybot: "You know. Ur strange running habit caught my "eye". That was why, I wanted to know you better. I always wanted to know. Why you run? This chilly morning. With these crazy crazy. I come to know that you humans are not comfortable in this temp.?"
Me: You know what? There is a greater cause?
Buddybot: What? Global warming? That’s TOP on my list of human problems.
Me: No. I run to fundraise for underprevilaged children. You know, how I complain about these traffic jams and stuff. These kids don’t even get proper education, 3 meals a day.
Buddybot: I don’t understand. How is your running going to help these kiddos?
Me: That’s complex. You wouldn’t understand.
Buddybot: I have a AMD Shangai,GPS, 3G powered only by SUN and It doesn’t get any more complex than this? Just explain.
Me: See, I started selfishly just to keep fit and to spend my weekends away from the bed. But when I saw these kids - I decided. To gift them their childhood.
Buddybot: To gift them their childhood????? I don’t understand. "childhood" is not available in ebay or Amazon!
Me: I wish it was only that simple. The sense of satisfaction that you get when they thank you…. Its out of the world.
Buddybot: Beep.. Beep.. Rebooting... You entered the emotional zone 0.1, which is still in beta...
Only we can understand. Only we can help. Lets gift them their childhood. Pls donate.
More about Asha's projects: http://www.ashanet.org/bangalore/marathon/projects.htm

Naturally negative...

2008-05-22T11:17:00.006-05:00

Take a look at the list...

Over sleep
laziness
procrastination
gluttony
obesity
Wrath
Do you really have to work hard to do any-of the above stuff??

Now.. how abt this one?
Advice
criticism
discouragement
temptation
depression
Lust

Do you have to pay for any of these??

Lets think of getting any of the following done...

Be fit and healthy
Be confident
Be conscious
Be courageous
Resist temptation

- Eazy huh?

I am tempted to conclude that Nothing worthy is free and anything free is unworthy.

Looks like, the world around is so spoilt that the considered "normalcy" seems to fall way into the negative.
Laziness is acceptable...
Over eating is not bad..
Procastrination is tolerable...
Health consciousness is extremity..
Dieting is "to be made fun of"...

World: Grow up!! Higher consciousness is bliss..

I wish, i act on all my thoughts..

2008-05-07T14:03:00.003-05:00

I wish, i act on all my thoughts..

Boost is not the secret of my energy!!!

2008-03-27T10:10:00.002-05:00

I feel pumped-up after talking to this guy. Even after a long dull day, just talking to this guy, energizes me. The reason I think is that, we resonate. We work on wavelengths, which are close and the interference is positive most of the time.

I also feel revitalized, When I talk to confused folks - In trying to make things clear to them, I end up feeling good and feeling stimulated.

So, whenever I feel dull, can I summon this "Energy dosage"??? The first guy maynot be available for the whole day. He has his own stuff todo... and I dont want ppl to feel sad and confused just coz I want to feel better.

Is there a way, by which I can call-up an "Energy Dose" out of myself.. depending on no external source??

I feel great peace, when I read books of my interest. But should I carry the books along and depend on them for my mental state???

I just know, that there is a way and I will find it... Should it be emotional or intellectual??? Which one is sustainable?? Should I really care for susteneance - if I can summon it anytime out of myself?

Back to School!!!

2007-02-09T03:22:00.002-06:00

Back to School!!!

On a cold Monday morning, after a tiring jog, I saw two kids waiting for their school bus to arrive. That just hit the slice of a hidden neuron with my childhood memories. Holding hands with my kid brother(who btw is taller than me now), standing in the bus stop waiting for the school bus, discussing various things from Cricket, WWF to the approaching exams. Fighting for the window seat taught me about 'the survival of the fittest'. Standing in the prayer hall in ascending order of height with one arm distance, one could hear the endless murmurs and the rumours about the holidays. "Repeat the prayer along with the prayer and not after the prayer" - Those golden words from our principal everyday.

Running in to the class just to find that the most boring teacher has borrowed the first hour to leverage on our early morning energy. As he ran from Phis to Xetas, we would be out cold even before the forenoon interval. Rushing through the crowd in the canteen to have a taste of that "1 Re Fruit Bar" - Gulping it down in a hurry and just in time for the next hour. Language is the most sought after class in the day. The musical French that the she would speak was a treat, until the Lunch bell when the real treat begins.

Those Fried Idlis with Podi made a great combination. I used to make new friends just because of my moms lovely food. All of a sudden, all our shoes are out; Our socks become balls, bags turn out to be stumps, and exam pads as bats. We rock the class room with Cricket and have the time of our lives - everyday.....

2006-04-23T08:18:00.002-05:00

Is LiFe tOo ShOrT tO liVe??.
- A question that takes too long to answer!!

Looking back now, i have lived(?) more than a quarter of my life time and i still do not know, if i have lived my life to the fullest. I have always wanted to get the top one and finally end up getting compromised to the next best thing. I was complaining about every one and everything around.

Now, do i realise that, if i cant even manage, satisfy myself or live my life to the fullest, i cannot think of changing others' life. Thanks to my new friend, i have understood that the only way to live is . . . . . . . . . . .(Realise it urself :))!! Now, that i hav started struggling, i am hopeful of finding new things to be happy about.

Certain things that we take for granted are well earned and deserved. Trying to make the most of every moment, with new found energy, i am finding .... running out of words.. wll continue.

2006-04-13T00:53:00.002-05:00

How am I going to live today and still create the tomorrow I'm committed to?

When i was in Primary school, i thought guys in High School have less home work to do.

When i was in High school, i thought Guys in college enjoy a lot. So i slogged my way to a pretty good Univ.

When i was in the Univ, i thought once i get a job, my life would be settled and i can enjoy a lot. So, did i slog to get a job in a good company with a handsome pay.

Now i am in a job, slogging my days (nights included), losing sleep over petty issues like DDR, Inductors etc.

Now, i realise that all along i was fire-fighting for a better and enjoyable tomorrow, not enjoying the present moment.

When will i be enjoying the present? Do what i Love than forced to love what i am doing?
Only Time can answer.

Publish Post

2006-04-03T23:24:00.002-05:00

Here We go..

Finally, i have decided to blog.. lets hope this keeps going unlike my guitar classes which started with a bang but lost momentum mid way..